The Postal Dude
The Postal Dude is a middle aged man and the main character of the Postal series. Postal Dude appears in all of the Postal games as a calm, but sociopathic man who is skilled in firearms and enjoys murdering and slaughtering numerous people no matter what the case. Though he often states he doesn't like video games after killing people, he is seen supporting them, since at one point he sets up a petition to "Make Whiney Congressmen Play Violent Video Games." He wears his trademark leather trench coat and sunglasses at all times, though he has the ability to change into various outfits that will affect how the people of Paradise view him and will affect the HUD with a unique design as well. Postal In Postal, the Postal Dude is a post office delivery man, but then goes off the deep end and starts to kill everyone that ever pisses him off. He appears in-game with light brown hair and a bright red coat. Judging by the weird, and somewhat disturbing messages that show before entering a level, it is plausible that Postal Dude suffers from a mental problem and believes he must slaughter everyone he sees in order to help the world. Postal 2 In Postal 2, he has moved out from his original home to the town of Paradise after accepting a job at the Running With Scissors video game developer company. He lives in a shabby trailer in a small neighborhood with his pet Champ the dog and his unnamed and bitchy wife, who continuously gives him orders and forces him to do various errands. When the Postal Dude goes to the RWS headquarters on Monday, he is informed by Vince Desi that he is fired. This and a video game protest mob by the Parents for Decency began his second reign of terror. After getting his check and fighting the Parents for Decency, the Postal Dude then proceeds to go to cash the check in the Fee of America bank. Just as the Postal Dude is cashing his check, a group of Bank robbers arrives to commit a stick-up. However, if the Postal Dude breaks into the money bin to get the money from there, an alarm will be activated and he will have his first clash against the Police. After cashing the check, the Postal Dude goes to Lucky Ganesh to get some milk. Once he returns home, the Postal Dude informs his wife the Bitch that he is on some kind of "vacation", so she decides to get him do more things for her for the rest of the week. On Tuesday, the Postal Dude decides it is time to confess his sins, so he goes to the Church to be forgiven by a priest. However, a group of Taliban Terrorists arrive and commit a terrorist attack, breaking into the Church, so the Postal Dude must face a large group of terrorists in order to get out of the church. After that, the Postal Dude must get 8 signs for a Petition to "make whiney congressmen play violent video games", which makes him deal with lots of rude civilians and prompts him to threaten them if they do not sign his petition. The Postal Dude then must go to the Library to return a book his wife has been reading. However, once he has returned it, a group of Book protestors break into the library, burning the building down and attacking everyone within it, including the Dude. He must find himself a way out of the library and fight many book protestors. Finally, he has to go to the Paradise Mall, where Gary Coleman has arrived to give autographed copies of his book, What I'm Talkin' Bout. Once there, the Postal Dude gets his copy, but suddenly the Police arrives to arrest Gary, initiating a fight against him and his crew. On Wednesday, the Postal Dude decides to go to the Cemetery and piss on his father's tombstone. When he does so, he is knocked unconscious by a group of Rednecks who take him to the Brewery. When the Postal Dude wakes up in the Brewery, he realizes the rednecks have removed his own clothes and make him wear a Gimp Suit, so the Postal Dude adds one more errand that is going to Money Shot Laundromat to pick up his laundry. After fighting a large group of rednecks and getting out of the Brewery, people everywhere makes fun of him until he gets his clothes back. Wednesday is also Election Day, and Cock Asian is hosting the elections. Also during Wednesday, the Postal Dude goes to the Forest to get a Xmas Tree. Given that it is July, the trees are much cheaper. After looking at several trees, the Postal Dude finally chooses the right one, but more rednecks appear and attack him. On Thursday, the Postal Dude notes that the weeds in his garden are getting too tall, so he needs something extra strong and decides to buy a Napalm Launcher at the Napalm Factory. Once he manages to get the launcher, a factory worker vomits on the machines, causing a major disruption in the production process, which resulted in a major explosion that destroys part of the factory. The Postal Dude must find a way to get out of the factory via alternative ways. Also on Thursday, Krotchy has arrived to the Paradise Mall, so the Postal Dude must get a Krotchy Doll. When he arrives to Toyz 'n tha Hood, Krotchy tells him there are no more Krotchy dolls left, but the Postal Dude breaks into the store's back room anyway, and manages to get a doll from the storage. This causes the Police to enter the store and try to arrest the Postal Dude. After defeating the police and getting out of the back room, the Postal Dude has to confront Krotchy himself. During that same day, the Postal Dude wants to get some steaks for the Psychotic Friends Network BBQ his is planning to attend, so he goes to Meat World. However, there is no one attending in the butchery, so he goes to the back room, where he discovers some Butchers triturating people alive in a grinder. The butchers attack the Postal Dude for discovering them and entering into the back room. Once the Postal Dude gets the steaks, the police enters the place and tries to arrest the Dude again for stealing steaks and breaking into Meat World. Finally, the Postal Dude must go to the Police Station to pay a Traffic Citation. On Friday, the Postal Dude goes to the Junkyard to get an alternator to fix his broken car. Once he gets the alternator, a tower crushes over a fence containing some dogs, blocking the exit and causing the dogs to escape and chase the Postal Dude until he gets out of the junkyard. In the same day, he gets a note that says there is a package for him, so he goes to the Parcel Center. However, when a Carrier gets it for the Dude, it explodes, causing the carriers to attack the Postal Dude in retaliation. Friday is also Uncle Dave's birthday, and the Postal Dude wants to give him a Birthday Gift, so he proceeds to go to the Compound, where Uncle Dave's "party" is taking place. The "party" is revealed to be the siege of the compound by the ATF. The Postal Dude manages to enter the compound and give Uncle Dave his gift, and in that very same moment the ATF finally manages to break into the compound, starting a massive gun battle against the Postal Dude and Uncle Dave's religious cult. Since the beginning of Friday, the Postal Dude wants to desperately piss, and when he does so, it hurts, so he decides to go to the Clinic. Once there, the nurses tell him he has gonorrhea, and tell him to go and see Vend-A-Cure, a machine that after receiving a piss sample from the Dude, gives him some Gonorrhea Medicine to cure him. After completing all the errands of Friday, the Paradise Times releases a special edition that announces the beginning of Apocalypse. During Apocalypse, there is a sudden outbreak of violence and all people in Paradise are armed, fighting each other, and will immediatelly attack the Postal Dude even if he is not carrying a weapon. After the Postal Dude manages to go back to his trailer, the Bitch asks him if he remembered her Rocky Road, an item she requested him to get for her since Monday, but that was never included as an errand. The Postal Dude then proceeds to shoot himself in the head to stop listening to his wife. Apocalypse Weekend On Saturday, the Postal Dude wakes up in the Hospital, where he receives a note by the Bitch telling him she has decided to leave him. He also receives notes saying that his trailer has been taken away, and that Champ is in the Dog Pound. Without any money, the Postal Dude proceeds to sell a sample of his semen, but as he does that, an experiment with cats goes out of control, with scientists obtaining dervish cats. The dervish cats kill the scientists and escape from their laboratory. The head shot also causes the Postal Dude to have hallucinations, in which he sees distorted versions of the places he is in, and with Gary Coleman-esque creatures attacking him, some of them using diseased cow heads instead of their own. These hallucinations will appear for the rest of the weekend from time to time. The Postal Dude eventually leaves the hospital, and feels really hungry, so he proceeds to go to the Greasy Panda restaurant in Lower Paradise. Once there, a group of zombies appear and begin to attack everyone including the Postal Dude, who is required to destroy 20 of them. After doing so, a police officer arrives and tells him he likes his style, and hires him to kill 21 cows infected with mad cow disease. After completing his mission, however, he is attacked by a group of Vegetarians. After killing the cows and defeating the vegetarians, the policeman reappears and assigns the Postal Dude the Super-fun Pigeon Hunter Mission, which is never shown. The Postal Dude then appears in Lower Paradise again, where he is contacted by Vince Desi, who rehires him and asks him to enter the headquarters of Bullfish Interactive, a rival company to RWS and to retrieve a Gold Master. The Postal Dude enters the publisher office complex and battles the security staff of Bullfish Interactive, until he arrives to CEO Phraud Hogslop's office. Hogslop refuses to give him the gold master, so the Postal Dude fights him in a boss battle. After defeating Hoslop, the Postal Dude is invited by Vince to go to his house to a party with the Postal Babes. On Sunday, the Postal Dude wakes up after hearing some shots, and he discovers a horde of zombies attacking Vince's house. The Postal Dude must destroy 80 of them, and after leaving Vince's house, he is addressed by a Mexican running an Elephant business. The Mexican tells the Postal Dude that if he helps him to kill 21 elephants at the Elephant Preserve to get their legs to make waste baskets for children, he will give him some money and a ride to Lower Paradise. However, after killing the elephants, the Postal Dude receives a new phone call from Vince, who needs some help with the marketing and asks him to do something that can make the media say the "competition's toasted". The Postal Dude decides to enter the Terrorist Training Camp to get something to create a nice explosion, and after fighting a whole army of terrorists, he finally gets a nuke. As the Postal Dude makes his way out of the training camp, the National Guard attacks the camp and arrests everyone in there, including the Postal Dude. The Postal Dude is taken to the Military Base, where he is forced to battle a large group of soldiers to retrieve his nuke and to escape the place. The Postal Dude returns to Lower Paradise, where a terrorist is leading a meeting attended by other terrorists, vegetarians, zombies and even Gary Coleman. The terrorist claims they are being oppresed, so they start a fight against the National Guard and the Postal Dude. The Postal Dude enters Bullfish Interactive's publisher office complex, only to discover it is invaded by zombies. The Postal Dude places the nuke in Hogslop's office. The wall behind Hogslop's desk has been destroyed and reveals the Dog Pound. The Postal Dude goes to the pound to rescue Champ, but discovers that the place has been taken over by rednecks, who are using trained cats and dogs in gimp suits to kill people. The Postal Dude confronts a large group of rednecks, dogs and dervish cats, only to discover Champ is missing. A final group of dogs have cornered the Postal Dude, but suddenly Champ breaks into the room from a glass ceiling, and single-handedly kills all the dogs. The Postal Dude and Champ then proceed to leave Paradise before the nuke explodes, but they must cross The Bridge and find the trailer before. The bridge is also invaded by zombies, and the National Guard also arrives to confront the Postal Dude, with some jets even bombing the bridge. After crossing the bridge, the Postal Dude sees his trailer in the distance, but Mike J the "Kosher Mad Cow Zombie" appears and starts a boss battle against the Postal Dude. After defeating Mike J, the Postal Dude and Champ get into his car, and are seen driving away from Paradise just as the nuke explodes, blowing the whole of Paradise up in the process. The Postal Dude is last heard saying "I regret nothing". Postal III Following the destruction of Paradise in Postal 2, the Postal Dude moves to Paradise's sister town Catharsis in Postal III. Being unemployed and broke, he gets a job at the local porn shop, working as a cleaner. Nothing much else is known about his experiences in Postal III. Gallery External links *The Postal Dude at the Internet Movie Database. Category:Individuals